Quote: "IF YOU CAN READ THIS, YOU'RE TOO CLOSE." Bumper sticker.
Figure of Speech: autophasia (auto FAY sia), the rule that swallows itself.
Autophasia literally means "the speaking of oneself," and it's one of our favorite fallacious figures. The only way you can understand the bumper sticker's warning is to violate it -- a perfect autophasia.
The figure makes a first-rate hypocrite detector. President Bush flying in Air Force One so he can urge people to conserve fuel, for instance. Or Al Gore's fat report on ways to save paper.
Snappy Answer: "IF YOU CAN’T READ THIS, YOU'RE ILLITERATE."