But God Still Won’t I.M.
Friday, March 30, 2007 at 10:16AM
Figaro

god_email.jpgQuote:  “I get many emails of course and yes I am busy teaching people how to be the best human beings they can be.”  God.

Figure of Speech: oraculum (or-A-cu-lum), the God’s words figure.

Our subscribers are curious souls.  One of them went to the length of tracking down God to fact-check  Figaro’s book.

Neil Davidson looked into the chapter called “The Jumbotron Blunder,” which advised using the right medium for a message.  People don’t pray by email, we said, because praying is emotional while email is a logical medium.

“I thought it was a good point,” Neil writes, “but thought I’d double check.  It turns out that God has a website (many, I think, but He claims this is His official one), and that you can indeed email him at god@godserve.com.” Neil asked God how many emails He gets, and His reply is our quote of the day.  It constitutes an oraculum, a figure that uses God’s own words for persuasion.  This is the ultimate argument by character, since God’s character trumps everything.

But when God is speaking for Himself, is it still an oraculum? We’ll say yes.  God can use any figure He wants.

Snappy Answer:  “I’m glad you’ve upgraded that burning bush.”

Article originally appeared on Figures of Speech (http://inpraiseofargument.com/).
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