On this Label Monday, we aim our figurative beam at the faceless fat cats behind an explosion of political attack advertising. In the infamous Citizens United case, the plumply feline Supreme Court bestowed human status on corporations. The American left went ballistic. A corporate takeover of American politics! But it’s not the corporations we should be afraid of. It’s the anonymity. This year alone, anonymous donors spent $132.5 million to sway elections. As we’ve seen on the Internet and on our highways, anonymity kills responsible debate.
The dough needs a label, and Figaro is here to provide it: anonymoney. It’s the root of much political evil. (Once again, we apply a portmanteau to labeling. This mash-up figure lets you associate two different concepts in one word to achieve rhetorical hybrid vigor.)
The American Founders risked their lives, fortunes, and sacred honor. America’s rich and powerful won’t even risk their comfort.