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    Annoy a Moderate. Make Stupid Bumper Stickers.

    annoyaconservative.jpgFrom Ask Figaro:

    There is a bumper sticker that reads, “Annoy a Liberal, Succeed, Be Happy.”  What kind of argument is that?  A fallacy? Thanks,

    Dear Diahn,

    When I say tomato, do you say tomahto? I ask not just because of the way you spell your name. Like your annoying quotation, my question is an isocolon (Greek for “equal member”), a figure that repeats phrases or clauses of similar length. 

    We won’t call a foul on the bumper sticker, because it’s within bounds to imply that liberals, egalitarian souls that they are, would resent a self-made fat cat.  But surely the right can do better than that.  How about “Annoy a Liberal, Inherit Money, Say You Earned It?”  No, that wouldn’t quite work either. “Annoy a Liberal, Shoot a Burglar” might be closer to the mark.  Figaro prefers, “Annoy a Liberal, Make a Bumper Sticker That Begins with ‘Annoy a Liberal.’”

    Any other suggestions for annoying liberals and conservatives?


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    Reader Comments (26)

    "Annoy a Liberal, Talk About Freedom."
    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterFosterchild
    "I Don't Care Enough About Liberals/Conservatives to Annoy Them"
    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterMarfa
    Annoy Printers. Don't Buy Bumper Stickers.
    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterJohn
    Annoy a Conservative: Marry Gay, Be Happy
    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterElise
    I don't see why conservatives are called "conservative." They seem to be the ones who want to change this country. So here's my contribution to annoy the far right:

    I'm a Conservative. I Believe in Civil Rights.
    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterTomas
    "But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth."
    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterSentient
    Nice one, Sentient. It's interesting that Matthew 6 has the right hand giving to the poor. Which inspires another bumper sticker:

    "Annoy a conservative. Quote Jesus."

    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterFigaro
    I guess in fairness, I should annoy a liberal now.

    "Annoy a liberal. Quote Jesus."

    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterFigaro
    I've forgotten the word for the trick of using words that sound the same as if they meant the same, but how about

    Annoy a Conservative—Conserve the world!

    Although in actual politics, far too many choices seem to be made on the basis that whatever annoys the other side must be good—and whatever the other side is doing, must be solely to annoy our side.

    My lefty friends would probably hand-letter (rather than purchase) signs that said something like "Annoy a liberal—advocate real change!"

    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterVardibidian
    Your conservative/conserve figure is a polyptoton (po-lip-TOE-ton), which repeats the root of a word in a different form.

    October 6, 2007 | Registered CommenterFigaro
    all you have to do to annoy a liberal is make him read the newspaper.

    your pal,
    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered Commenterblake
    Great bumper sticker, Blake. It probably would work for both liberals and conservatives.

    October 6, 2007 | Registered CommenterFigaro
    Annoy a CONservative: Do your own thinking
    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterKirk Muse
    See today's image, Kirk.

    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterFigaro
    Annoy a conservative, cut spending, and support small government.
    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterJohn
    What do you call the figure of changing a title, idiom, or known statement slightly, like we're all doing here?
    October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterSpencer
    Are these slightly different forms of the same "argument" snow clones?
    October 7, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterLinda
    They are indeed snowclones (they're clones, so you use one word). They're figures that change a cliche for a new purpose. See http://www.figarospeech.com/it-figures/naked-is-the-new-clothed.html
    October 7, 2007 | Registered CommenterFigaro
    Hey Fig how about:

    "Annoy a conservative/liberal, challenge their beliefs in a constructive, rational and delibrative manner"

    or to put it simply...

    "Annoy a conservative/liberal, listen to both sides of the argument"
    October 8, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterShannon
    That reminds me of the Calvin & Hobbes strip, where Calvin wonders why superheroes don't battle more realistic villains. Hobbes suggests that the heroes send letters to the editor and shouts, "Quick, to the Bat-Fax!"

    October 8, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterFigaro

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